We take ourselves so seriously sometimes…Here is a little humor sent to me from across the pond.  I’m sharing it to remind you to be joyful!

“While shepherds watched, their flocks by night, all seated on the ground.
The angel of the Lord came down, and glory shone around”

The Shepherds Union has lodged formal complaint that it violates health and safety regulations to insist that they watch their flocks without provision of appropriate seating arrangements.  Shepherds have also requested that due to the inclement weather conditions, they should be allowed to watch their flocks via cctv cameras from centrally heated shepherd observation huts. Please note, the angel of the lord is reminded that before shining his/her glory all around she/he must ascertain that all shepherds have been issued with glasses capable of filtering out the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and Glory.

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“Little donkey, little donkey on the dusty road
Got to keep on plodding onwards with your precious load”

The RSPCA have issued strict guidelines with regard to how heavy a load that a donkey of small stature is permitted to carry.  Also included is guidance regarding how often to feed the donkey and how many rest breaks are required over a four hour plodding period. Please note that due to the increased risk of pollution from the dusty road, Mary and Joseph are required to wear face masks to prevent inhalation of any airborne particles. The donkey has expressed his discomfort at being labeled ‘little’ and would prefer just to be simply referred to as Mr. Donkey.  To comment upon his height or lack thereof may be considered an infringement of his equine rights.

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“We three kings of Orient are / Bearing gifts we traverse afar / Field and fountain, moor and mountain / Following yonder star”

Whilst the gift of gold is still considered acceptable – as it may be redeemed at a later date through such organizations as ‘cash for gold’ etc, gifts of frankincense and myrrh are not appropriate due to the potential risk of oils and fragrances causing allergic reactions.  A suggested gift alternative would be to make a donation to a worthy cause in the recipients name or perhaps give a gift voucher.  Please note as per the guidelines from the RSPCA for Mr. Donkey, the camels carrying the three kings of Orient will require regular food and rest breaks. Facemasks for the three kings are also advisable due to the likelihood of dust from the camels hooves.

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“Little Jesus, sweetly sleep, do not stir; We will lend a coat of fur,
We will rock you, rock you, rock you, We will rock you, rock you, rock you:”

Fur is no longer appropriate wear for small infants, both due to risk of allergy  and for ethical reasons. Therefore faux fur, a nice cellular blanket or perhaps micro-fleece material should be considered a suitable alternative.  Please note, only persons who have been subject to a Criminal Records Bureau check and have enhanced clearance will be permitted to rock baby Jesus. Persons must carry their CRB disclosure with them at all times and be prepared to provide three forms of identification before rocking commences.

~ Peace and JOY!